It is my turn to give to you...

When you have to make some decision, you may say, "Oh, God, if you could give me some powerful experience, then I could/might be able to have a strong commitment," thinking that you are willing to make the decision but you need something to strongly encourage you...

Well, sounds good, since you are "willing to" make the decision. Not bad.

But, think again. Haven't you already receive so many encouragement from God? Didn't you have quite a few experiences through which you have been inspired, uplifted, convinced of God's presence...that's why you are still here, isn't that right? Think about how you could survive up to this moment while you have been through so much. Can you deny God's existence?

Then why are you asking him to give you another? "Only if you give me another something, then I will be firmly committed to go this way." Isn't it like demanding if not threatening?

Shouldn't you say to God, "God, you already have given me so much. Now this is my turn. Please don't worry about me. Now it's my turn to give to you." Should I not change my life from "give me, give me..." to "let me give, let me give..."? How would my conscience respond to this? Is it not my God-given right to be able to choose what my conscience would be satisfied?

As long as my conscience agrees, I will be with God closely. And he is the source of my life. And he is the God of suffering--as the parent of all his poor children. Now it is good for us to say to him, "I will give to you. Please don't worry about me..."